This week was finals. It is difficult to explain what finals mean to anyone who has not experienced them, but to those that have I can now understand your pain.
There were sometimes this week where I just couldn't help it anymore. I cried like a baby. The tears just wouldn't stop coming and I could not help it. My roommates all looked at me with understanding in their eyes which made me cry more. (I seems that I cry for others also.) What makes finals so difficult is that you see several grades, in my case most were bad, in one week. Whoever thought that giving students one week to complete, in my case, 5 tests was insane. They must have been so smart that they did not understand the pressure that would be put on a less intelligent person.
I am so glad that I am finished now though. It feels like I can breath. I am not exaggerating. I would go into the test alright and by the time I had gotten to the 5th question I was gasping for air. I wasn't that the test was so hard necessarily, but that the pressure put on me as a student was almost to much to handle. Sometimes I wonder if I was really meant to come to college. I am just so glad that I can now look back on the experience and say "I am never letting that happen again, but it is over now and I did what i could." I have taken my big sigh of relief at being done. I can now enjoy my Christmas break:)
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Sunday, December 7, 2008
Choices
I just found out today that a girl who I have known since elementary is going to get married. Her family was strong in the Gospel and she knew from a small age what was right. She just graduated from high school and is going to marry the boy she dated all through high school. They are both 19.
It is so sad to me that people make choices like this. I know that we are all given our free agency for a reason, but sometimes I wonder how our Heavenly Father can stand to watch us make some of the decisions we do.
The other day I was walking to class and I was headed straight for a tree. I voiced this to my roommate Aubree who I was walking with and she said "No you aren't" as she gave me the slightest nudge to the right. Within 4 steps I was out of danger. It was one of those weird moments when you realize that even the slightest change in direction can lead you miles away from the destination you want.
I have often heard stories about plains, or ships and how if the calculations are off by 1/2 a degree the plain/ship will not reach the desired mark. I understood this mathematically, but I had never actually seen it until the other day.
One small choice and we will land in a foreign world where we can feel all alone. What a lonely way to live life. On the flip side, about a week ago I was at the store. I saw another friend who had never had a testimony of the Gospel. She was rebellious all through middle school and high school. I really wondered what would happen to her later in life. When I saw her she told me that she had turned her life around. She looked great, had that "glow" about her, and she told me that during the summer she came to know that the Gospel was true.
Small choices lead to big outcomes. I feel like telling all those who are going to make a dumb mistake in the next 5 seconds. "Don't do it. It is not only going to affect you!" I have seen whole families become inactive, children raised in hate filled homes, and relationships ruined because of one very small choice.
We have to remember that others will be affected by the choices we make.
It is so sad to me that people make choices like this. I know that we are all given our free agency for a reason, but sometimes I wonder how our Heavenly Father can stand to watch us make some of the decisions we do.
The other day I was walking to class and I was headed straight for a tree. I voiced this to my roommate Aubree who I was walking with and she said "No you aren't" as she gave me the slightest nudge to the right. Within 4 steps I was out of danger. It was one of those weird moments when you realize that even the slightest change in direction can lead you miles away from the destination you want.
I have often heard stories about plains, or ships and how if the calculations are off by 1/2 a degree the plain/ship will not reach the desired mark. I understood this mathematically, but I had never actually seen it until the other day.
One small choice and we will land in a foreign world where we can feel all alone. What a lonely way to live life. On the flip side, about a week ago I was at the store. I saw another friend who had never had a testimony of the Gospel. She was rebellious all through middle school and high school. I really wondered what would happen to her later in life. When I saw her she told me that she had turned her life around. She looked great, had that "glow" about her, and she told me that during the summer she came to know that the Gospel was true.
Small choices lead to big outcomes. I feel like telling all those who are going to make a dumb mistake in the next 5 seconds. "Don't do it. It is not only going to affect you!" I have seen whole families become inactive, children raised in hate filled homes, and relationships ruined because of one very small choice.
We have to remember that others will be affected by the choices we make.
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